Friend of brand new BKA

[Liz]

RENARDWC at ctrvax.Vanderbilt.Edu wrote:

> One day Liz H. joined us:
> I was roughly the same age but fortunately I did not have to go thru
> months of agony with someone trying to perform heroics and save my leg.
> Bingo. One moment TAB...the next, BK. BTW, what is your friend's name?
> For the moment we can call him, uhhhhh, Bruce.

We can call him Bruce.  <g>  I'd like to keep his name anonymous for now.

>
>
> Be there, be a friend, and let it go and accept the notion there is not
> a lot you can do other than show love and respect. I notice you did not
> mention pain and am curious, since you are an RN and probably observed
> many post-ops, how he is dealing with it? Of course I would love to hear
> there is none, which would be oh-so-nice.

That is pretty much all we've been able to think of to do.. just enjoy his
company like we used to so he knows he hasn't lost everything.  I don't know
how his pain is, he's been on painkillers for the past 3+ months and I am
sure he has pain.  I would be very surprised if he didn't.

> LH> Also, I would appreciate hearing about what helped you the most in
>     the beginning... we would do just about anything at this point to
>     help him through this.
>
> In the beginning, the presence of my mother, who I wanted to see more
> than my brother and sister (whom I dearly love), girlfriends, guys I had
> known (all this happened a few miles from a small Florida town where I
> once lived) for ages...I wanted my mother, and she was there.
>
> Them, later, the presence of those other folks (brother, guys I used to
> hang with) was most important who I discovered did not treat me much
> differently than they did before the motorcycle accident. We laughed and
> carried on much like we always had...like, uhhhh, idiots. Beevis and
> Buttheads.
>

LOL!!!  That sounds just like us!  <g>  We act like complete idiots too,
well, except for me, it's mainly Bruce and my boyfriend!  <g>  Well, maybe I
am a closet idiot!

>
> And then, later, as a young, single, healthy, 20 year-old male, I was
> extremely interested in how I would be perceived by women. This was a
> major issue once I got over the initial trauma (at first it was
> pain...all consuming) and, in my case, I was extremely fortunate to have
> had a few friends who, in their own sweet way, assured me that hey man,
> you are still, uhhhh, OK, it's cool,

:)  Bruce is a very sweet guy and I've always thought so, I am a big flirt so
this shouldn't be a problem!  <g>

> and to this day I am very grateful
> to these people. Gail, Bonnie, Jodi....I have most certainly not
> forgotten. I suspect Bruce might share the same interest and concern. My
> guess is he does :) If he has any female friends, their presence can be
> most heartening, and ---extremely---important, to a young man, or even
> an old one haha....

LOL!  Well I will see what I can do about this part... not much probably but
I am sure it will be a major concern for him!

>
>
> And now, this old man is going away to listen to Merle Haggard, who,
> with his crack band, sings about mothers, prisons, drinkin', and a
> redneck kinda love.

:)

>
>
> Wayne Renardson

Thanks again Wayne, you've been a big help since I first wrote to you and I
do enjoy reading your posts.  You've got a great sense of humor and I
appreciate all the suggestions!

Liz

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